A limiting belief is something you believe to be true about yourself, about others, or about the world that limits you in some way.
We all have limiting beliefs, some are known to us, the others unknown and buried in our subconscious mind.
To keep it simple the mind is divided into two aspects: the conscious and subconscious.
The conscious mind is the logical, thinking or analytical part of our mind. It allows us to set goals and navigate through life. The notion of past and future only exist in our conscious mind.
The subconscious is part of the mind of which one is not fully aware of but which influences one's actions and feelings. It is the realm of our automatic and habitual thought patterns and beliefs. The body functions like heart rate; breathing; digestion; our learned body movements like riding a bicycle; driving a car; and all other habitual activities we do happen without us having to consciously think about it.
Characteristics of the subconscious mind
The subconscious is always in the “now” (as opposed to the conscious mind that can integrate the notion of past and future). It communicates with you via emotions and dreams.
The subconscious mind cannot differentiate real events versus imaginary ones. Everything that you see, in real life or on a screen, imagine or dream is considered real by the subconscious mind. If you live a scary event you can become terrified but you can also become terrified just by imagining it.
The subconscious mind cannot process negative words. If I tell you “Do not think about an elephant” what do you do? Of course, you will think of an elephant. Its image flashes across your mind, even if only for a millisecond. Negative commands like “don’t” are not processed by the subconscious mind (this is the reason why during a Kinesiology session goals are set up around a positive statement).
The subconscious mind will always gravitate to what it knows. Unknowns are seen as scary to the subconscious mind, because it cannot calculate a known outcome with an unknown variable. Being habitual, the subconscious mind is typically resistant to change through normal conscious processes.
The birth of limiting beliefs
Most of our habits and emotional conditioning were programmed during the first seven years of our life, usually by our interactions with and experience from how our parents, teachers, peers, TV, etc, responded to life. We learn subconsciously how to act and what happens when we are happy or angry, what it takes to make money, how best to express love, when it’s safe to laugh, to sing, to shine… and when it’s not.
Taking this example: as a little boy, you may have been hurt and wanted to be comforted by your father. The response you may have received from him, could have been “Boys don’t cry” or “Don’t be a wuss” and be sent away. Your need for comfort would have been ignored, you may have felt that something was wrong or inadequate about asking for support or expressing vulnerability, felt rejected by your father.
In order to not feel this way again, protect yourself from being hurt or in hope of being accepted by your father, you may have subconsciously decided that you would not cry in front of him anymore and show a brave face. After some time, that action will become a subconscious learning and you will start expressing the program “I must be strong”.
Some other examples of common limiting beliefs are “I need to be perfect in order to be loved”, “I must not be like my mum”, “I am not good enough”, ”life is a struggle”.
Whatever we believe and think becomes our reality. We will adapt our behavior in order to achieve feeling a certain way or not feeling another. As a result we may become “over-achievers”, display addictive or avoidance behavior.
Doing so limits our possibilities, constrains the expression of our authentic deeper selves and our vision of the world. We may feel “stressed”, “stuck” or “dissatisfied” and might drive ourselves to the ground, which may also result in diseases.
Working on limiting beliefs using Kinesiology
It is important to align our subconscious beliefs with our conscious ones if we wish to achieve a fulfilling career, relationship and other goals.
Working on limiting beliefs can help us "see" in a new way, we become less reactive to triggers and are able to respond more appropriately. This work will reveal a world of unlimited possibilities.
Using muscle monitoring as biofeedback mechanism, Kinesiology can directly tap into the subconscious and what it unknown to us. Using this technique and targeted questioning based on the analysis of your constitution, I can help you identify what your hidden programs may be and their origins.
Bringing awareness to these beliefs, realising that we have been running them, in other words bringing them from an unconscious state to a conscious, is the first step to let them dissolve. To create deeper lasting change and transformation, we also need to work on the physical feeling it is associated to, to ensure it is addressed at a subconscious level.
Using various techniques such as positive affirmations, guided meditation, felt sense and energetic work, we can then “de-stress” the limiting belief and re-write new more empowering programs.
This process will be supported by home reinforcement exercise that you will be given between sessions. Tackling limiting beliefs is an ongoing process.
A good place to start, if you want to touch on your conscious beliefs is to ask yourself:
- What do I remember my parent(s) saying to me as a child about work, money, weight, showing emotions?
- What beliefs do they have that I probably absorbed as child?
Another way is to listen to your self-talk, that inner voice that is talking to you all day, and just write down whatever comes up.
For more information about Kinesiology and how it can help you or to book an appointment: contact Aurelie 04 50 676 990 or email: firstname.lastname@example.org
References & further readings:
McLeod, S. A. (2015). Unconscious mind. Retrieved from www.simplypsychology.org/unconscious-mind.html
Gendlin Eugene, T (1978) ‘Focusing: how to gain direct access to your body’s knowledge’ p43-45